The Kush Queen family is deeply saddened by the untimely loss of Charlotte Figi. Her legacy has impacted cannabis medicine forever, and without a doubt, has saved many lives. We send our sincerest condolences to the Figi family and Charlotte’s loved ones.
This blog is dedicated to Charlotte.
Have you checked in with how you’re feeling?
If you’re anything like me, your answer can change from moment to moment. Everything is up in the air and there’s no end in sight. Nothing feels normal anymore.
And no matter who you are or where you land on the privilege spectrum, we’ve all experienced a great deal of change and loss in a very short time.
I think we can all agree on that.
As a cannabis company, Kush Queen is grateful to be considered an essential business, and personally, I know I am tremendously privileged to have a job that allows me to WFH. Given my good fortune and experience in dealing with my own grief, I knew it was time to draw from my past and help where I can.
To help our community cope with what’s happening, we’ll be exploring the various types of loss, how grief shows up, and what you can do to heal and move forward in spite of Covid-19.
What We’ve Lost - Coping with Covid-19
We’re experiencing multiple forms of loss and grief, both personally and collectively. Just in the last month, we’ve lost:
- Our sense of safety, security, and abundance
- The ability to manage our health, especially those with existing health conditions
- Loved ones diagnosed with Covid-19
- Faith in our government and health care systems (if you had any to begin with)
- Jobs, businesses, livelihoods, routines
- Physical human connection
- Freedom to mobilize, gather and celebrate or mourn with our communities in person
The list goes on and on. All we can do is comply with safety measures and do our best to take care of ourselves and our families. One way to do the latter is by taking the time to understand what we’re experiencing.
Types of Loss and Grief
Did you know that there are over 40 types of grief/loss? We often think of death when we hear the word grief, but many other life events can cause us to grieve.
You might already be going through one or more of these types of loss:
- Collective Grief - when a large group of people grieve the same event or person
- Ambiguous Loss - things like loss of future, loss of abilities, or loss of something intangible (think invisible illness, financial loss, cancelled plans, loss of opportunity)
- Anticipatory Loss - knowing a loss is coming, but not knowing when
- Disenfranchised Loss - when your loss isn’t validated or carries a stigma; loss of older population, loss of detained or incarcerated loved ones (loss can be caused by the incarceration or detainment), loss due to overdose or suicide
- Cumulative Grief and Secondary Loss - when a new loss triggers grief from a past experience, or an additional loss stemming from a primary loss (the death of a partner leading to the loss of social connections that they maintained)
You can see how our current state of sheltering-in-place, being quarantined or isolated, confronting existential dread, and facing shortages of essentials and medical supplies can create multiple levels of loss that we may not even be aware of or think to acknowledge as grief when starting to cope with Covid-19.
How Grief Shows Up
Grief doesn’t always show up the way we might expect it to. We can thank our culture of emotion avoidance for our lack of understanding grief and loss and how they affect us. Grief, especially of the unresolved or unacknowledged variety, affects how we behave, how we feel emotionally, and how our bodies work.
Grief Is A Holistic Experience
On the behavioral level, major loss can trigger low energy and extended periods of stagnation and boredom. It may also appear as junk food bingeing, seeking relief from substances, or unhelpful addictive behaviors, further causing us to feel lethargic, apathetic, and numb.
Emotionally, sadness isn’t the only way feelings of grief show up. Left unexamined, grief may trigger anger, fear, hopelessness, and overwhelm. As you can see, it can be very easy to overlook grief as an underlying cause of these feelings if we don’t explore what may be triggering them to begin with.
Facing loss and anticipating it can make us feel uneasy and stressed, which can lead to restlessness and trouble sleeping. These states of distress are physiological responses, meaning the body reacts to what is happening in the mind.
How to Shift Into Healing
It’s important to acknowledge that no two people grieve the same, nor does grief show up the same way for the same person every time they experience it. Take it from someone who lost both parents to illness by the age of 23.
Furthermore, not all remedies will help everyone, but there are a number of ways to switch out of melancholy and into hope.
Move It to Lose It
If you’re stuck in a low vibe state, the easiest way to shift that is to get up and move!
- Take a walk in your neighborhood (with protective gear, as recommended by your local authorities)
- Find a yoga or workout video online to boost your endorphin and endocannabinoid production
- Do some jumping jacks, accept a push-up challenge, or dance to your favorite DJ (many are playing live sets from their living rooms or remote locations to pass the time--DJs get bored, too!)
Quarantine, but Make it Mindful
Doing something mindful can help pull you out of a negative spiral.
- Breathe. Take deep breaths and try directing your breath to your belly to avoid short shallow breaths, which can cause the physiological responses you’re trying to avoid.
- Try orienting yourself to your surroundings if breathing doesn’t work or is labored due to illness.
- Observe the items that occupy the space you’re in
- Pick a feature to notice about them, like their colors (the blue towel, the rose gold frame, the yellow lampshade)
- Do this for at least 5 items
- Check in with yourself to see how you’re feeling
- Explore the world of guided meditations online. YouTube has plenty, like this one by Ram Dass or you can use an app like Calm or Headspace. Do it in the bath with our 200mg Relax bath bomb to elevate your mediation with mood boosting essential oils and a full body dose of CBD
- Kush Queen Gummies Rx can help boost your mood and ward off worry. Bliss is a 1:1 ratio of 15mg CBD and 15mg CBG for energy and euphoria or the original CBD Gummies Rx to curb stress.
Let It Out then Let It Go
Getting thoughts and feelings onto paper makes them concrete and easier to examine. Even speaking them can make them less daunting.
- Write your thoughts into a journal. If you can’t express yourself in words, make it a piece of art. Anything goes as long as it’s helpful to your state of mind
- Pen a letter to yourself, either in your present state or a younger/older version of yourself or someone else entirely
- Text our KQ Hawtline (anonymously) at 213-298-9111 to get anything you need off your chest. Feel free to vent, crack a joke, complain about your quarantine partner, or mourn a loss. We’re here to hear you out.
- Phone a friend. Or host a Zoom chat with family. When you do, be sure to share how you feel. The most surprising thing about all of this is how much we’re all feeling similar emotions. Trust me on this one.
Giving IS Receiving when Grieving
Another way to shift your vibe away from loss or an impending sense of dread is by shifting your attention to others.
- Give thanks those giving their all by nominating a Frontline Hero for a Kush Queen care package. It’s the least we can do to help the people we all rely on.
- Be helpful to your community--share your resources with your neighbors, help them shop for groceries, or simply share tips on navigating the pandemic. This is a time to come together.
- Send some love to someone who’s struggling and get a gift from us for being so thoughtful with our Gift One Get One bath bomb sale.
We've only begun to scrape the surface of understanding grief, but I hope it helps put things into perspective for you. Want more blogs on this topic? Text the Hawtline at 213-298-9111 and let us know!
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